It's been nearly a year since my mother's death and yet I feel it as keenly as if it were just yesterday. I've lived this past year in autopilot. Never aspiring to anything more than my daily life. I feel ashamed that I should dishonor her as I have. I don't know how to bring myself back to life. I don't know where to even start.
It's as though I've lost all ambition and will to truly live. That's not who my mother was.
My mother was strong and free spirited. She believed you should live everyday as though it were your last. She taught me always to see things clearly and unhindered by prejudice. She showed me that everything in life was worth experiencing. She lived her life to the fullest no matter what came her way. She died doing the same.
She's an inspiration to many. Myself most of all.
And yet, here I am. Unfulfilled and unmotivated. My life slowly drifting in an abyss.
I'm a lost lamb simply waiting for the wolves to devour me.
I pray for guidance.